If you are like me, you have likely worked many different jobs over the course of your career. That being said, it is very likely at one time or another, you have probably left a place of employment because, let’s face it, the job was terrible.
Of course, there are a variety of things that make jobs terrible; from overly demanding bosses to boring work, backstabbing co-workers to long hours, many people find that when they are ready to leave, they simply can’t resist telling their boss to take the job and shove it!
So if you have ever wanted to tell your boss where they could stick that job with no regrets, you should be able to relate to (and probably applaud) the following people who did exactly that.
It’s Quitting Time @ Starbucks
I worked at a Starbucks inside a Target. After three years of being denied any sort of promotion, I got a new job and I put in my two weeks. After I put in my two weeks, my manager used those weeks to torture me with disgusting cleaning jobs. On my second to last shift, I decided I was done.
I took all the timers (about 10 of them) and set them to go off the next day in five-minute intervals and proceeded to hide them in different spots. The best part was after a minute the timers stop going off, so the person working had only one minute to find them. Found out from a former coworker it took them almost two weeks to find all the timers. I also found out my manager was fired after I left and it was discovered I had been doing 90% of her job.
“She treated all her employees like garbage”
I didn’t know this was my last day but at least it was epic. I was working in a whole foods deli when I was 15, making salads to be sold in the store. I’m halfway done and my manager comes out and loses her mind. Apparently, I had made the salads wrong by putting the cheese on top of the croutons instead of croutons on top of the cheese. She goes off! Yelling about how teenagers are too immature to work in the deli and stuff like that. I yelled back that she was a terrible person for making me work 2 pm to 10 pm one day and 5 am to 1 pm the next. Also how she treated all her employees like garbage.
She says I need to watch my tone, but I didn’t care and just flat out told her, “I quit.” She gets this smug look on her face and says if I quit without a proper notice I can never work for whole foods again. I say that I’ll remember that when I’m a 55-year-old who’s only skill is making sandwiches. She looks like she’s trying to say something, but instead she just fell down. She had ending up fainting and had to be taken to the hospital.
Fired Over His Fangs
I knew a guy in high school who hated working at a movie theater. Called his boss and told him he wasn’t feeling well because he went hiking, got swarmed by bats, and got bit by one.
He actually showed up later that evening to watch a movie with a cape and fake fangs in his mouth. Fired on the spot
I was sixteen, washing dishes at a super fancy restaurant. The owner was a nasty old pig. He was this 50-something, greasy, sweaty, flatulent, unbathed old French dude. He hit on me whenever he got the chance, which made me really uncomfortable. I wore a mid-shin length apron for the job. One day Mr. Sleazeball came and lifted my apron. I choked out a “WTF?!” He leered at me saying, “Eey jesst wanted to see if your knees waz deerty.” Then he winked and gestured toward his groin.
That was the final straw. I looked him dead in the eye and swept a stack of hand-painted, imported, $100-$150 each plates to the ground between us, shattering them. I stepped over them and out the door. One week later, I returned to get my last paycheck. He smirked and said I had broken $1,600 in plates, so I wouldn’t be receiving a paycheck. I just smiled and said that I’d be getting my full pay, or I’d go to his wife, who was the business manager. I got my check, and never looked back.
Soccer Momma Drama
My wife worked for a certain chain coffee shop a few years back. She got another job and requested reduced hours. 3 weeks went by and she still hadn’t gotten them.
During that third week, she had a soccer mom from hell trying to get her attention by throwing snowballs at her through the drive-thru window. My wife then stopped what she was doing and tossed this soccer mom’s iced tea at her (which exploded everywhere) and slammed the window.
5 minutes later she had written her letter of resignation, with the only things she could find: a purple crayon and a sticky note.
Much Needed Vacation
I worked for a technical support call center that had 400+ people in one room with horrible system admins. I had put in for a vacation 3 months prior to taking it. I rented my cottage up at the Cape and just had to work that one day until I had a much-needed week off. My boss called me at 10 am and told me my vacation was canceled since they didn’t have the proper coverage. I nearly lost my mind. I told him everything was paid for and it was scheduled for MONTHS! Dude told me to get my money back. Forget that!
I thought about it all day. I hated everything about this job. I took my final call. I signed out, shoved my chair back, put my sunglasses on and walked out with both my middle fingers in the air. I took my vacation and never went back. Forget that place.
I used to work at a place that rhymes with “Pizza Hut” and the managers there were real cheapskates. There was this nice old man that would come in every Sunday and order a triple extra cheese pizza and while they charged him for the 3x cheese, they would forbid us from ever actually putting that much cheese on a pizza because apparently cheese in the pizza selling world is akin to gold.
So instead of 3x extra cheese, he would really be getting what the instructions would qualify as barely enough for a regular cheese pizza.
On the day my 2 weeks’ notice ended the old guy just happened to be my last order so I went into the walk-in and grabbed an entire box of cheese, proceeded to dump the entire thing onto his pizza and tossed it into oven. It was stacked so high that it couldn’t even fit into the even and half of it was scraped off.
Anyways, the look on the old guy face when he saw me do this made it all worth it (imagine pure excitement). Needless to say, I didn’t put the correct phone number down for future job references.
Joining My Regulars
I was waiting tables and I quit mid-shift on a busy Friday night. The new GM had told the hostesses to stop seating people. There was a line out the door and half of the restaurant was empty. I put a bunch of tables together in my section and sat my regulars altogether (they usually wound up all talking anyway). As the bartender was making their drinks I went to talk to the GM.
Evidently, he saw that there was a plate in one of the side stations and decided he would stop seating everyone until it was moved to its proper place. He did not tell anyone, just stopped seating tables. I told him that making people wait was bad for business. He could have asked, and anyone would have just taken it to the back. He said he did not want my opinion. I said, ok, then these are my last customers. I proceeded to get crunk with my table. When we were done I checked out and went to the bar next door with them. They gave me a great tip and bought my drinks. It was a great night and I never went back!
The Popcorn Incident
There was a UPS strike in the 90s and I was employed by them in high school as a sorter. Blockbuster Video at the time had this mail order deal where you’d get a VHS tape and bags of popcorn. Like a proto-Netflix thing, I guess.
Anyway, all these boxes full of microwave popcorn and VHS tapes would slide down the belt and about half of the popcorn bags would explode or break. After about an hour there was popcorn dust all over. I asked my boss for a mask, and he said that they didn’t have any. Some of the drivers walked by wearing masks, and I followed them and found a full cabinet full of masks. I confronted my boss, and he was like “the masks are for drivers, only”.
So, I went back to the sorting area and just stopped working. I just stood there. The belts were backing up with these boxes of popcorn and they would burst, and clouds of powdered popcorn butter would fill the air. I waited about 45 minutes before the belt shut off.
I walked out through a haze of popcorn dust, with alarms blaring, people running everywhere trying to figure out what was going on. A lot of people didn’t get their VHS tapes or their popcorn that week.
Rehab Your Attitude
I was 16 and working in the kitchen of a rehab hospital. My two bosses disliked me. I’m guessing it was my ‘mature’ sense of humor. Everyone who worked for them HATED THEM, but I was the only one who they knew felt that way. Anyways, they would never approve my requested days off and always gave me a terrible schedule.
I had requested time off for an out of town concert, it was purposefully denied so obviously I went anyway! I called in sick to all of my shifts for those days and showed up for my last paycheck the next Monday. Boss said, “this is your last paycheck” and I said, “I know, I already said bye to everyone. I came in here last to tell you that we all make fun of your raging, glass cutter nipples when you take inventory in the freezer.” My bosses, face dropped and I just walked out smiling.
I used to work for my father. It was probably the worst time of my life. He treated me like garbage, paid me very poorly, and made me work 70+ hours a week. I was just out of high school, but when I complained, his response was always “if you don’t like it, there’s the door.”
6 months before I quit, I had to work his night shift, which meant 6PM -6:30AM Monday through Saturday. I was very unhappy about this, so I applied for another job. I got it and went to my father’s office with a list of demands, he responded with his usual reply, so I said, “Alright, I’ve gotten a job offer somewhere else, screw you, I quit.”
The look on his face was priceless. He truly believed that because I had amazing job security that I’d be willing to put up with anything and that I’d stay there for my entire career. In one short, sweet instant, I proved to him that this was not the case, and he lost his most valuable employee.
The icing on the cake was the fact that the job that I left him for is at the company that manufactures the very machinery and software he relies on in business. Any time something goes wrong in his factory, he has to call me to fix it for him.
A Hallmark Moment
I lasted for two months at a greeting card store. The first strike was on day 1 when the training video said to “Be sure to suggest Kwanzaa cards to all of your African-American customers.”
My manager was an awful human being. I was written up for taking too long to take out the garbage! It was a ¼ mile walk to the nearest dumpster. It took about ten to fifteen minutes total to do this, lock the back door and come back inside. I got written up for “taking too long” on a night where everything was done and were dead.
The tipping point was when I came in to check the schedule and found 2 forty hour week schedules. It was finals week. I had reminded my manager twice. But I knew this wasn’t an accident–she just didn’t care.
I grabbed my check from my locker, took a greeting card off of the shelf and scrawled “screw this place, I quit.” inside of it. I placed it in the envelope, sealed it and put it on my manager’s desk.
I was told she screamed a lot in Russian when she saw it and wanted to press shoplifting charges on me. Mall security practically laughed her out of the mall.
Locked Into a Bad Situation
I was working for a same-day delivery company as a Christmas job during college break. After a while it was too much, as I had to stay at work until deliveries were unpacked; this meant that some days I was leaving for college at 8.30am and not getting home from work until 1am.
One night we had a particularly large delivery and it was getting very late with no end in sight. I decided I’d had enough and told the supervisor I was finished, didn’t want to do the job anymore and wanted to go home. He rejected this and said that I was going nowhere until the delivery was unpacked. I stood in front of him and repeated that I quit, therefore, I don’t care about the delivery, completing my studies was more important to me than earning a bit of extra cash. He still said I was going nowhere and refused to unlock the door to let me out.
Despite feeling, I had a case for false imprisonment I decided to take matters into my own hands; I ran out the fire escape door and down the street never to return. I’ll always remember the sound of the fire escape door making a big DOOONG as it hit the metal railings and I made my escape to freedom.
The Last Goodbye
A friend of mine worked in the accounts department with a fairly quiet Indian dude. Anyways, the guy is leaving the company for a new role and as was customary they had him stand on a chair to give a speech.
You know those niggling things that annoy you about your colleagues (e.g. answering personal calls all the time) but you can’t bring up because of office politics/poor managers? Well this quiet guy stood up and matter of factly laid everyone’s annoying quirks bare. He talked on for about 5 minutes going around the office talking about the people he felt were useless, made 2 women (who were lazy AF) cry and then thanked everyone else he hadn’t mentioned and left. My friend was awestruck!
That “Ah-Ha” Moment
I worked in a video store when there was such a thing. My co-worker showed up very, very high. He was also about 6’3″ and 140 pounds, so he stood out in a crowd to begin with. Anyway, he came in for a 4-hour shift, stood in the middle of our bank of checkout registers…and just ate chips. Like, 6 bags of chips back to back, and he ate them SLOW, and savored the heck out of each bite. The whole time he had zero facial expression, think of the dull stare of a chewing dairy cow.
After about 3 hours he calmly turns to me and says “I can’t do this anymore”…gently sets down his bag of chips, and walked out the door. We never saw him in the store again.
Don’t Call Me Tommy Boy
I worked at Taco Bell. My boss looked like Chris Farley. One day he wrote me up because I was speaking Spanish with my coworker and some white lady got upset.
Next day I taped a picture of Chris Farley in his office with a little note that said “I quit fatty!”
Family Comes First
I had a primary job that gave me decent hours, but I wanted more for the summer, so I sought out a second job. I landed a spot as a hostess at a chain restaurant. A day into that job, my mother goes to the hospital and is diagnosed with a terminal illness. Naturally, it wrecks me. I was a teenager and already had a lot to deal with (as a teenager would) at the time.
I learn this about halfway through my shift. The supervisor pulls me aside and comments on my attitude. He say’s I am not smiling much that I seem down, etc. I was honest and told him about my mom. I told him I was trying my best.
Then he tells me, rudely: “Your job is important, and you need to be focusing on that now. Your mom can wait.” I left on the spot.
Peace I am Out
After I had an interview, they told me they wanted me to come in that night to start my training. When I called my current employer to tell him I was calling out that night, he flipped out and started screaming at me (this was also the first time I’d be calling out in my over 2 years of employment).
Now, this guy was the reason I had found a new job in the first place. He would schedule me to work when he knew I had class, threaten to fire me if I didn’t come in when he’d have other people call out. All because he didn’t like me and knew he couldn’t have a valid reason to fire me.
Well, when he started yelling at me for calling off 6 hours before my shift (plenty of time to find someone to cover) I said, “You know what John, I was going to give you a two-weeks’ notice, but since you’re such a terrible person, I quit.” Hung up the phone and never went back there again.
Can You Do It Better?
I walked straight out of my job at DQ when I was 17.
It was lunch rush on a Sunday. We had a skeleton crew since lunch was the only busy time of day. I had 11 orders on the screen with more coming in, absolutely flying around the kitchen making stuff.
Manager was standing in the doorway, literally just leaning up against the wall, chirping at me like “Wow you’re kinda slow today” or “I thought you were faster than this”. I was still getting orders out in <6 minutes and she wasn’t even offering to help. I was already sick of working there but this pushed me over the edge. I asked if she was going to help and she said no. I asked if she thought she could do better than me and she said “of course”. I told her “Okay then, have fun” and dropped my hat/name-tag on the counter and walked out.
Felt so good. I got a job two weeks later in a department store making more per hour, with no grease/heat and coworkers who weren’t annoying people.
You Can Do Both
I was working at BK, at 18. I was one of the closers so I was there until 2 am every night. For the most part that was ok, but there was this one dude who worked there that totally sucked. He was like 10 years older than the rest of us, lived with his parents and had this weird gravelly voice that was hard to understand
One night we were closing together, and I was in a bit of a bad mood. I had worked a bunch of days in a row, and because I was always working with trainees I had to do the same job every time.
When closing there are two jobs: broiler and fryer. I had been doing fryer every night and I was sick of it.
It was about 9 PM and the grumbler came up and said I was doing fryer. I told him I had done it every day that week, so tonight I was doing broiler. He looked at me said: “Nope, you are doing fryer”, then walked off.
I got instantly pissed. We were having a mini rush, so I just walked up to him, took off my apron and said: “You can do them both”, and I threw my apron in his face and walked out.
The Old Going To The Bathroom Trick
I was a teen and desperate for some quick money, so I went to one of those placement companies. You know, the one that docks you something like 30% of your pay for the privilege of putting you in an awful job.
So, I got a job at a packaging plant. Our goal that day was to assemble brooms. You would get a pallet of handles, and a pallet of brush heads, and you were supposed to screw them together, and then put them on an empty pallet.
I struck up a conversation with a guy at the same table as me. We were enjoying ourselves and assembling brooms at a very fast rate–we had already done a few pallets while everyone else had only done one. It’s amazing what how just having a good time can make you work harder, and make the time go by faster.
So, we took a break around 10, and when we came back, the floor manager sent us to different tables. As in: the furthest two tables that anyone could possibly inhabit. I asked him if we were doing things wrong or something.
He said, literally: no, you’re having too much fun and talking while you work.
I excused myself to go to the bathroom and simply drove away.
Best Day Of My Life
Working for Waffle House as a “floater” manager – meaning I covered anything for the restaurant manager or cooks/waitresses. Not only cooking and waiting tables, but doing inventories, stock order, bank runs, managing the tills, you name it.
The job was brutal – 16 hrs a day, 14 or more days at a time before a day off. I usually got stuck working 3rd shift + 1st shift, which means the bar crowd on weekends, plus the morning rush the next day. Also had to work every holiday.
I’d been asking for some day shifts for a long time, so I figured I’d look at the schedule. Of course, they put me on 3rd shift all week. Went out to my car, grabbed my uniforms and told the smirking manager, “Thanks, but no thanks. I quit. Good luck covering the shift.”
Best part: As I was walking back to my car, the District Manager and his boss the Area Manager were walking in. I stopped to talk to them and they asked the standard, “How you doing today?” Having just quit and having a huge burden just lifted from my shoulders, I answered honestly: “I’m doing GREAT! Best day of my life.” They smiled, I waved, got in my car and left.
The Night Shift
After being passed over for a change of shifts after working more than 2 years, and 6 months of requesting it and being denied a change, I got pissed. Graveyard will really mess with your life, and seeing multiple new hires get day and swing shift pissed me off to no end.
So, I grabbed a case of beer, wrote a really sarcastic note about not being Dracula and how I deserve to see the sun, taped it to the door, and shoved the key through the crack after locking up. So be kind to your local convenience store cashier, because while you sleep, they stand there under the fluorescent lights all night, dealing with tweakers, drunks, stoners, and weirdos.
Do-Nut Lie to Me, Kathy!
The final nail was when my boss asked me (her assistant manager) to disburse employee checks while she was on vacation. They were mailed from the home office and I had to separate and put them all in envelopes. It was then that I realized this she only offered me 50 cents more per hour than her favorite donut maker. When she got back I asked her about it. Told me it was a mistake.
The next payday she asked me to do the checks again when I came in for my shift. No problem, with the exception that she had taken the donut makers check out and gave it to her personally, so I wouldn’t see it. That was the final straw. The next day I went in ten minutes before my shift was to start and threw my name tag on the counter and told her that I can’t stand a liar, and I’m not going to work for someone like that.
The look on her face was awesome. My coworkers told me she had to stay and cover my shift and all my shifts, as well as her own for almost a month. I took two weeks off and found another job that ended up paying way better with better hours. In your face, Kathy!!
Ya Messed Up, Dave!
My manager stopped answering my emails. Just stopped. I was practically begging for a meeting to discuss my future/a long overdue raise/etc. I got fed up. The last email I sent said “Ya know what, forget it. I don’t need a meeting now. I quit.” I had a better job later that same day, making more money, with more benefits and half the stress.
Dave, if you’re reading this, ya messed up, bro.
Thanks, But No Thanks…
I worked at a Taco Bell in high school for 1.5 years. I was employee of the month 9 times. It got to the point where they just gave me a pretty large raise for my age. A new manager with a serious attitude problem hated me for some reason. I had a day I called in sick, but was convinced to at least come in for pre-opening morning stuff just to get the store on its feet.
The store opens at 10am at which point my manager and a few staff are scheduled to start, which is when I left. By the time I got home I had a voicemail on our answering machine with this crazy lady SCREAMING saying I’m fired for job abandonment.
I called the regional manager who gave me my job back instantly. We had a big meeting with the regional manager, store manager, and the crazy manager. She got blasted and it was glorious!
The meeting ends with the big dog managers getting her to apologize to me, and she can just barely get the words out. They asked if I had anything I wanted to add…”I quit”
Hoarders Without Borders
Last year I worked for a moving company in LA county. Arriving at a new job, we saw a note that says, “may have difficulty moving through apartment,” which typically meant furniture and things are messy simply because they are moving. No big deal. We show up and we’re greeted with this horrendous smell, the only thing I could equate it to is that fresh skunk spray smell. We start walking through the house and realize we can’t see the floor, there is so much crap lying around.
Hoarders. Unfortunately, it had been a really slow month and after calling our supervisor and arguing for 20 minutes they advised we needed to, “tough this one out,” for the sake of our jobs. After just 30 minutes, I can’t stand the smell anymore, I’m gagging just being in the house. We walked out. The customers were furious. Our supervisor called and said if we don’t go back we are fired. We all decided to pull over, turn the truck off, lock the keys in the car, and get Uber’s home.
We got word the next day from coworkers that the supervisors didn’t do the job because the house was so bad. We all quit/were fired, but it was worth it.
Good Guys Finish Last… Or Do They?
I had been working on this idea for a small tech company I worked for. I spent hours on developing a business plan with cash flow projections, financing needs, budget numbers, all the fancy accounting ratios, and even had a list of people that were interested in the services after a test run.
Presented everything to the executive team. They decided to move forward with it – without me. I was to continue in my sales role. No promotion, no offer of a raise for my project, nothing. I told them to get bent and walked out. One of my finer moments.
Home Depot? More Like Beach Depot… Amirite?
I asked for 4 days unpaid for spring break when I was at Home Depot. Was gonna do Saturday through Tuesday and enjoy the beach. We had more than enough people and all the guys I worked with had no problem working those 4 days. They approved me for Monday and Tuesday only. I understand you don’t have to give me those days, but I rarely ever asked for time off and I never called in sick.
Well, Saturday rolls around and I’m drinking on a beach when I get a call from my least favorite manager. “Where are you? You were supposed to blah blah blah.” I said “I’m getting drunk and enjoying the sun. Screw and the horse you rode in on guy.” Had a blast btw.
Howdya Like Them Trousers?
I was working part time at a gas station. The company provided a corporate branded t-shirt as a uniform but nothing else. I tended to wear an old pair of jeans because it wasn’t the cleanest of jobs. Sometimes I needed to help people to fuel up, put oil in their cars, etc. so would get pretty dirty after a 10-hour shift.
So the Area Manager rocks up one day and starts mouthing off about the state of my jeans and that I should be wearing “smart trousers.” I explained that I was not given any as part of the uniform and I wasn’t going to ruin smart trousers for minimum wage. Argument ensues about jeans not being “authorized leg-wear”, so I took them off and stood there in my boxers. More arguing and shouting from the Area Manager, so I took them off too, turned around, bent over, told her this was where she could shove her job, got my stuff and got the heck out of there!
Let’s Taco Bout This…
I worked grill at a Del Taco. One night, half way through my shift, a big beast of a woman came in furious that she didn’t get her shake. After 20 minutes of me trying to calm her down even after telling her I’d give her the shake for free, I got fed up with her (and customers in general).
I went in the back and filled a large cup with cold Ranch dressing gave it to her and immediately quit.
Two-Week Trials Are a Two-Way Street
I don’t know if this is a blaze of glory, but it made me feel good. I got a job in the big city, my new manager said that she wanted to give me a two-week trial period because she just wasn’t sure about me.
This manager was TERRIBLE. Constantly yelling, expecting us to work through lunch and work late and come in early, and even hosted sessions in her office about how awful we were. I was miserable, the job was hell.
The Friday of the end of my trial period, my manager called me into her office. She said she was pleasantly surprised at how good I was, and she definitely wanted to keep me on. I told her that unfortunately she had not passed her trial period and I would not be staying. Then I walked out. The best elevator ride down to the lobby ever.
And Now, We Wait
One of my first jobs was part time at a small budget supermarket. The boss was a imbecile of severely limited intelligence, assigning me far more shifts than I agreed to and spending the entire day shouting at everybody (rather than doing actual work).
Turns out I was also getting one euro less per hour than agreed on as well. I noticed that after a month when I finally got my first pay. Not cool. Grounds enough for me to terminate my work contract with immediate effect.
So, I got myself a new job, typed out my notice, put it in my coat pocket and waited for the worst possible moment to quit. That moment came 2 weeks later. My boss and I were opening on a Saturday, and it just so happened that the cashier that was meant to come in an hour later called in sick.
He tells me and goes off on a tirade about how the shift is going to be hell with just the 2 of us. I smile, hand him my notice, and stroll out of the store without saying a word.
Best. Feeling. Ever.
Never Trust a Cable Guy
Not exactly a blaze, more of a slow burn. I used to be a Comcast tech. Put in my 2-week notice and promptly got as many parking tickets as I could.
The tickets couldn’t be pegged to me, because I didn’t own the vehicle. Comcast has a policy that employees need to pay their own parking tickets, but by the time Comcast got the tickets in the mail, I would not have been an employee anymore.
And, you know that phenomenon where work vehicles can park anywhere and not get a ticket? That does not apply to vehicles that say Comcast on the side. I still like to imagine the curses made in my name after they uncovered the extent of my evil plot.
75 Cents Worth Of Justice
I needed a job. I was out of money for school. At the time, had about five years of trade experience. I took a significant pay cut to get this job and was told that at 90 days I’d get a review and it’d be worth it. The housing they promised was awful. North Dakota was awful. I held out for 90 days to see this awesome raise, thinking oil field, big money was coming.
“You’re a great employee, we’re very happy having you on board, etc.” They gave me a seventy-five-cent raise. I thought about it and realized I still I had some pride left. I scribbled a resignation letter that said “here’s 75 cents worth of notice. I quit.”
Left it on supervisors’ desk and went home. I got a call the next day, I ignored it. Got a text, “can’t believe this is your notice” I texted back “For 75 cents, what do you expect? A first-class letter?”
Error: You Stink
I used to work as a designer for an emerging tech company. The new tech that we were producing was extremely cool but the founders that ran the company were brutal. They had about 15 designers and developers working long hours while cramped in a tiny office. Getting screamed at was pretty much an everyday occurrence.
One of the founders once shredded me for my “unskillful” work, only to present it as his own work to the other partners later that day. My own boss actually plagiarized my work. I’ve never had that happen before. I decided I’d had enough after that and finally put my “non-skills” to good use.
Friday of that same week I coded up a fake error message to aid in my quitting, and blasted it out to the entire company. I got up and waited by the elevator until I saw people starting to read it. There was so much laughter once people realized what was happening. My boss was furious, but it was all worth it just to see the look on his smug face.
Mom I’d Like to Fire
“In college I worked as a nanny to several families. I had never had a family that I didn’t get along with until the Pritzky’s came along. The mom was insane and a compulsive liar. She would say she was going to work, but would go and spend the day shopping instead. She didn’t want her husband to know about her shopping habits so she would order things from gucci, LV etc & my job was to take the box home with me from UPS, unpack it and then place items in her closet the next day.
The last straw was when I showed up to work 5 minutes late because traffic was bad. She stood outside screaming at me in the driveway about how irresponsible I was. She then threw her baby into my arms and stormed off into the house, grabbed her keys & went to Starbucks. When she came back, I looked her straight in the eyes and in a hushed tone said “you don’t scream at people to get your way. I thought I was caring for one child, but apparently it was for two.” Her mouth dropped open, I grabbed my purse and left. I actually got a brand new Gucci bag out of it because she couldn’t face me to get it back!”
Keep Cleaning Breadstick Boy
I was working at a pizzeria and part of my job was to clean the tray that the breadsticks were baked in. Like most other parts of my job, it was a daily task and I didn’t need to be reminded to do it every single day. For some reason, I think it was because my boss liked to torment his employees, he constantly reminded me to clean the breadstick tray even as I was doing it. It was super annoying.
So one day as I was cleaning it, my a-hole boss came by my station and told me to “keep cleaning”. I got so mad I flipped over the tray into crowded line in a during their Friday rush hour. I removed my gloves, extended both middle fingers, and never looked back.”