Sometimes, secrets in a relationship can be a good thing. While we aren’t exactly encouraging you to lie to your partner, sometimes it may be necessary. You see, we have some stories where people haven’t been very honest with their significant others, and for good reason!
They’ve lied to their partners and spouses to spare their feelings. Whether it was because they didn’t like a gift, whether a pet died or disappeared or whether they saw a surprise coming a mile away, they’ve all kept quiet about it so their significant others would not get hurt. If you like to sympathize with them or want to be inspired by them, just keep scrolling.
41. The “Missing” Cat
Several years ago, one of our outside cats went missing; it was my wife’s favorite and she was pretty upset. I had actually found the cat that morning and discovered what had actually happened to it. The facts and circumstances leading to its death would upset her tremendously.
She still thinks to this day the cat was taken by a rogue coyote or something, when in reality, she had accidentally backed over it in the darkness of the morning when leaving for work. I’ve never been able to bring myself to tell her and never will. I felt awful for her. I even feel awful telling the internet about it now and it’s been years!
40. It’s A Prank! But It’s Really NOT.
My girlfriend had a few too many shots of tequila at a party and passed out on the couch. When I went to check her, I noticed she pissed all over the couch.
To avoid embarrassment, I filled up a bucket with water and threw it over her to disguise it as a prank (I’m that kind of boyfriend). She still has no idea.
39. I Stayed For Her
When my girlfriend was pregnant, she liked to take baths every night before bedtime. Every now and then, I’d join her and enjoy the relaxing hot water. One day, we were both sitting in the tub when she farted a pretty big fart. She and I both laughed and I gave her crap for possibly breaking the tub. Then, I notice a few brown things in the water. It turns out she had pooped a little.
I was so absolutely disgusted that I nearly vomited. I didn’t want to freak out because I know she would feel terrible and impossibly embarrassed. So I turned the jets on, added some bubbles, and sat there with her for another 10-15 minutes. Afterward, I suggested that we both shower off because I had added too much soap for bubbles. I still think about those poop chunks floating around next to me whenever I take a bath.
38. The Lost and “Found” Necklace
The first piece of jewelry I bought my wife was a necklace. We went on holiday and she lost it. When I said I would replace it but it wasn’t the same, she was upset that she’d lost it for sentimental reasons.
I emailed the hotel and of course, they hadn’t found it. So I bought a replacement and told my wife they found it.
37. All for Banana Bread
Occasionally, I’ll hide bananas, then make them reappear when they are brown just so she will make Banana bread.
I will literally be like, “Look! You bought these bananas and no one ate them, so they’re brown. I’m not about to waste these so why don’t you make some banana bread or something?”
36. It Was A Pretty Good-Sized Roach
My wife had her drink on the floor one evening while sitting on the couch, watching Netflix. She took a drink and immediately spat it out – a bug had gotten in her glass and she almost swallowed it.
I immediately grabbed the drink, told her “it’s just a little moth,” and while I disposed of the drink-ruiner she gagged profusely and rinsed her mouth out (all bugs freak her out). Thankfully, she was soon mostly over it since it was such a small moth. I will never tell her it was a pretty good-sized cockroach.
35. Goose Tales
My boyfriend, growing up, lived on a hobby farm. He had a goose he had raised from an egg and he loved it like it was a dog. One day when walking to his house, I saw his goose on the side of the road, hit by a car. I told his mom when she answered the door and she told me not to tell him.
Thirty years later and married now, he brings up the goose in a story to friends and talks about how it flew away. My lips are still sealed.
34. The Sweetest Surprise That Wasn’t Really A Surprise
I knew he was going to propose. The man is so easy to read; he’s my open book. I love that about him because he wears all his emotions on his face. He’ll plan a trip for my birthday months in advance but then be so excited and proud about surprising me that he has to tell me straight away or make me guess where we’re going.
He’s not so cracking at surprises, so he’s always SO proud of himself that he surprised me that one time, and that I had no idea! Except I did, I heard him talking to his granddad about the ring and saw the heart-shaped lump in his pocket- plus he’d been talking about marriage all the time thinking he was being sly. I’ll take it to the grave though; it honestly makes him so happy and he’d be so disappointed with himself if he thought he’d given it away. God, I love that man.
33. The Stone is Fake
The first Christmas after I got together with my partner, he brought me a beautiful opal necklace; he knew it was my favorite stone and I suspect he paid quite a bit. He’s proud of the thing and loves to see me wear it and told me that when he bought it, he paid for a slightly smaller opal; the shop worker accidentally grabbed the wrong one, so he got an upgrade to a bigger opal for free!
My partner also has a whole thing against fake stones in jewelry; he thinks it tacky, horrible dishonest, etc. Long story short, what he doesn’t realize is that my beautiful opal is fake. I love that stone, though. I don’t wear much jewelry, but I haven’t taken that necklace off in three years.
32. Lowering the Bills
My girlfriend moved in with me a few months ago and wanted to split the monthly bills. I was already covering all of it so I was OK just continuing that way, but she was insistent.
She’s also not making too much so instead of telling her the real amount, I told her a lower one, but still a believable amount. It isn’t much, but I feel a little better knowing that she’s saving up a bit more every month than she would’ve otherwise.
31. Oh, Deer!
I jokingly call my wife a Disney princess because any animal that she comes across, she has to talk to and greet; she just has a beautiful heart. At that time, I was working the day shift and she was working a swing shift. She sent me some pictures of a young doe that was eating in our front yard and she seemed thrilled. I came home and saw the same deer, dead on our porch. I realized I had six hours to get rid of it before my wife gets home and her world is shattered. I call my local city authorities and it turned out, they couldn’t care less. Frustrated, I call my dad to get advice on what to do.
Within the next 15 minutes, I see my dad back his huge truck into my back yard, then we had that thing loaded up and found a special place to “dispose of” it. We made it back with 20 minutes to spare.
I haven’t told my wife because I think it would break her heart. Anyway, my wife thinks her deer friend is alive and well, and not at the bottom of a ravine.
30. Miss Money Slipper
I feel really bad about how much money he spends on me (food, gifts, gas money) and he refuses to let me pay him back, so sometimes I slip $5 and $10 bills into his wallet, pockets, and dresser drawers for him to “find.”
If he gives me his card to go into stores to buy something, I use mine instead and don’t tell him. He’d be really really sad if he found out because he loves taking care of me.
29. I Disliked it, But It Was Worth it!
On my birthday, my girlfriend at that time gave me a wristband made out of metal that I absolutely disliked. However, I obviously couldn’t tell her that I hated it since she probably put a lot of thought into picking it and I didn’t want to upset her.
So I told her that I loved it and wore it for months in order to convince her that I actually liked it. I wore that thing to every date and every day where I knew I would see her since it always made her happy to see me wearing the wristband. It was worth it!
28. For A Good Cause
I can’t tell my husband that I didn’t actually find our dog. I told him that the dog was lost and alone in a parking lot. The truth is that I actually paid $70 to a couple of homeless people for their dog. He didn’t want a dog, and I knew these people wouldn’t take care of her.
So I made up a sob story that she had no one else and I just convinced him that she should stay, rather than me finding her another home. He absolutely loves the little maniac now.
27. The Pet Resurrector
My wife thinks that our betta fish, Mojito, has been alive for like five years.
What she doesn’t know is that the role of Mojito has been played by THREE separate betta fish over that time. R.I.P. Mojitos one and two.
26. Defending Him from Bees
My husband is terrified of bees/wasps. Just the word ‘bee’ will get him to start looking around nervously. He is very embarrassed about this fear because he knows it’s irrational, but I have developed a sixth sense about the presence of bees.
If we’re outside and I see one buzzing around, I’ll make sure I either stand in his way so he can’t see it, or I’ll make an excuse for him to go inside. I’ve found wasp nests in and around our house, and I take them out while he’s at work and then never say a word about it. He doesn’t know that I’ve been on a 24/7 bee patrol for him for the past three years. I’m afraid he’d feel humiliated if he knew, but I don’t mind.
25. He’s Terrible at Reading
My SO used to read me chapters from whatever book he was reading at the time. It was usually me that initiated it, mostly because it felt so warm and intimate, but also because I knew he had dyslexia and dysgraphia as a child so it would give him a little boost of confidence.
But this also meant he was actually really terrible at reading stories. I’m talking pure monotone; it made any book extremely boring and I would cuddle up next to him so I could see it and read it in my head as he read. But I liked to think the good outweighed the bad, and I never told him!
24. The “Secret” Message
When I was pregnant, I got really down because a lot of my friends started to not bother with me. Out of the blue, I got a message from one of my friends from high school.
About a week later, I was using my partner’s phone to make a call and I came across a message he’d sent to the person who contacted me saying I’d been feeling really down lately and could they just send me a message to check up on me. He still doesn’t know that I found this out, but it meant a lot to me when it happened.
23. The “Funny” Memes
My boyfriend loves to show me memes/funny posts that he thinks I would find really funny, but I spend more time online than he does, so I’ve usually seen them well before he shows me.
Every so often, I pretend I haven’t yet seen a post just so he gets the satisfaction of being the first to show me.
22. The Hidden Millions
I can’t tell my SO that I inherited a few million from my mother who died when I was a child. I’ve mostly left it alone because there wasn’t anything, I wanted that I couldn’t just get with some elbow grease.
Once we are at the cusp of doing the house and kids thing, I will let him know so he can stop worrying about earning enough to put a down payment on a new home.
21. A Not-So-Unique Necklace
My SO got me a beautiful necklace for our one-year anniversary. It says love in a hundred languages when you shine a light through it. He was so excited to give it to me and so pleased he’d gotten me such a good, romantic present.
The only problem was that my best friend had been given an identical necklace from her boyfriend on her birthday a week prior. He had no way of knowing and was so happy to get me such a unique gift, that my friend and I just coordinate, so we never wear them at the same time.
20. The “Clue” Questions
Every year, I know exactly what she’s getting me for Christmas. My wife is sweet but terrible at planning surprises. She uses my Amazon account for prime benefits, buys things using our joint account instead of her personal account or cash, and “hides” things in the trunk of the car thinking it’s not a place I’d ever go into.
Also, she asks too many questions like, “Hey, you like RayBans, right?” or “my coworker was talking about this work out vest and was wondering if you could give tips. What’s your size again?” I continue to act surprised each time because I know it’d break her heart otherwise.
19. The Snack-Hiding Secret
If my mom wants to hide literally anything from my dad, no matter what it is, she just puts it somewhere he would have to bend over to see it. It doesn’t matter if it’s something like a package of Oreos. If my dad has to bend over to find it, he’s never going to find it.
I’ve tested it with my own snacks when I was still living with them to confirm that it works. He’d be mad if he knew how many snacks we’d hidden from him simply because he doesn’t bend over low enough to see it in the cabinet.
18. His Favorite Show Sucks
I can’t tell my husband how deeply I hate the Big Bang Theory. He is a MASSIVE fan of the show. From being a pure ‘nerd’ to a poor facsimile of ‘Friends,’ he’s been following it from the start. Now with Young Sheldon, he’s found another reason to cackle madly along to another terrible laugh track.
And I will sit beside him, madly cackling as well, because it just makes him so damn happy. The Sheldon show can die in a dumpster fire. But I’ll burn with him before I tell my husband how badly the show sucks.
17. The Secret Load of Laundry
I took a girlfriend with me on a vacation to Hawaii. The first thing we did when we hit the hotel was shower off since it was a long flight. I’m washing her down and as I was washing her butt, I notice she’s left a huge poop stain on the washrag.
I’m disgusted, but I love her, so I clean her up and hide the rag, so she doesn’t find out. Later that night, I wake up and do a secret load of laundry, so she never knows.
16. Mayo Madness
My SO’s favorite dip has about 80% mayo. The thing is he has a TERRIBLE aversion to mayo and refuses to eat it on its own.
His mom always made it when he wasn’t around; she did it his whole life, and now, I continue the charade.
15. Poor Crow
I left for work one morning and there was a crow sitting in our driveway. I disregarded it and went about my business. I came home and the crow was just sitting there, but now, it had a bowl of water and a plate of breadcrumbs with it. The bird appeared sick but had been nibbling on the bread crumbs. This went on for two days, and my wife was constantly monitoring it, hoping it would build up some energy and leave.
On day three, I came home to find that the bird had passed away. I quickly took the bird out behind the house and buried it before the wife came home. She thought the bird got back its strength and it flew freely again. This was 7-ish years ago, and she still tells people the story of the crow.
14. When Roaches Attack…
My wife is deathly afraid of roaches. She gets crazy goosebumps and pretty much is reduced to tears if she sees them. She’s from Texas and had to deal with scorpions, so this is crazy to me. But it’s my job to dispatch the intruders via death by Swiffer mop.
She usually goes to the other room and I’ve had a few occasions where I missed the roach and I would grab some toilet paper and ball it up like it was inside and tell her that they are dead. I don’t have it in me to tell her that we have a D.B. Cooper roach hiding inside our house somewhere.
13. The Punchline Pretender
My wife once did the joke: “Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the idiot’s house. And knock knock, who’s there? The Chicken,” over text with me. I “fell for it” because I knew it would make her happy.
She loves talking about how she “got me,” and it makes her so happy. I can’t bring myself to tell her I was the one who told her the joke in the first place.
12. The Sweet Savior
My girlfriend locked her keys in her running car with her dog inside when picking up her daughter from daycare. I lied and said I had AAA so it’d be free to get a lockout service.
In reality, I ordered AAA on the spot and paid the extra to have same day service, so she didn’t have something else to worry about.
11. The Car Sold Her Out
My partner from a long distance relationship surprised me by being in my flat when I got home from work since we hadn’t seen each other in a long time. She was messaging as if she was still back at her home.
The poor thing didn’t know that I saw her car parked down the road on my walk home! She was ecstatic to surprise me – something I won’t ever tell her I knew!
10. Not A Cheesy Good Bye
My husband bought mozzarella cheese a couple of weeks ago. I was cleaning out the fridge and threw out an open bag of cheese. I didn’t really think about it since there were a few old things next to it. I just went on autopilot.
The next day, my husband was wondering where the cheese was. I haven’t told him, and I never will.
9. His Ball Python Died
My boyfriend and I had this wonderful ball python snake we called Rocky Balboa. He loved that snake so much; he would literally sit for hours playing video games or watching TV with this huge snake around his neck. He got way too big for our little apartment, so we agreed we would give him to our friend so we could still visit him.
Three days before we re-homed him, I found him dead. I was so distraught that I threw his cage away and buried our beloved baby in the front yard. I didn’t have the heart to tell him that he died, so my boyfriend thinks he’s living with our friend out of state. He still asks about him and if I think he’s doing okay and it wrecks me every time.
8. It Hurts So Bad!
I can’t tell my wife how much it hurt that she did not do anything for my 50th birthday. We are born almost a year apart. This year for her 49th, I took her on a cruise and signed her up for a scuba excursion she always wanted to do. And she loved it, of course.
Her 50th is next year and I’ve already started planning it. I have contacted old friends from her high school, as well as family to get a bunch of them to go on a cruise for her 50th. It was going to be a surprise, but someone let it slip at Christmas. When she found out, I figured she would do something for my 50th since she never does anything for any of my birthdays. Nope, she got me a store-made cake.
7. The Ticket Taker
A few years ago, my wife lost her grandfather, was working a crappy job and was developing some of the medical issues we’re currently dealing with.
One night, I went out to start her car to warm it up before her shift and found a parking ticket. I pocketed it, paid it, and tossed it without her knowing. She didn’t need that on top of everything else.
6. The Sweetest Secret
I can’t tell my wife I fell in love with her on the first date. I was afraid it would have scared her away (it most definitely would have) and I was in denial.
I had major walls up and she was perfect that first date and has been ever since. I didn’t want it to end and I still can’t get enough time with her.
5. The Secret Recipe
Sometimes when I make my boyfriend’s favorite homemade chicken tenders, I use mayo in the dredge before I flour it.
He would literally keel over and die if I told him this. It would ruin his favorite dinner. We both freaking hate mayo but damn, if it doesn’t make a good dredge.
4. Mind Game
Every time, right before we leave the house, I play a mental game with myself where I try to guess what she’s going to need while we’re out (but won’t bring) and I grab it (a warm hat, an extra set of gloves, a small snack, inhaler, battery pack for her phone, etc.).
Sometimes, I even slip it into her bag without her noticing; other times, I reveal that I had it all along in a critical moment.
3. The Diet Supporter
I don’t tell my girlfriend my REAL weight. We are both dieting together and I tend to lose weight much faster than her (I’m aware that it is usually easier for men to lose weight for physiological reasons).
I don’t want to discourage her by telling her I’ve lost twice as much weight in the same amount of time.
2. Who Loves Spiders Anyway?
A few years ago, I had a big cup of water on my nightstand with a straw, and when I went to get a drink, I felt something odd in my mouth. When I spit it out, it was a spider. My girlfriend, who was with me, is terrified of spiders.
If I had told her, she might have never slept in that room again. Thankfully, I’ve moved since then and I now use a cup with a lid that closes all the way.
1. Her “Surprise” Gift
We don’t exchange a lot of gifts at Christmas, but we do try and pick one thing out that the other person would love to have, but didn’t ask for. This past year, while my wife was out walking our dogs, the UPS guy knocked on the door and dropped off a large package. It was labeled ‘Pizzeria Pronto,’ and was the gift she’d ordered for me!
I took it inside and then thought to myself, ‘Nah, let me put it back on the front porch.’ She came in from the walk and hid the box in her Jeep. When Christmas rolled around, she was very pleased that she was able to ‘surprise me’ with something I really wanted.