We’re not sure which human told the first lie or even when it happened, but we know that they’ve evolved since then. Sometimes people are so great at telling untruths that we aren’t even aware that we’re being lied to. On the other hand, there are times when the universe is on our side and the lies we get told are instantly revealed- and those are some of the most glorious moments ever.
And no one knows that feeling better than our storytellers today. They’ve been told lies but were able to sniff them out like bloodhounds. And if you’d like to find out how they did it, and what happened after they did it, just keep reading.
40. This Copycat Got Caught Red-Handed
I once had a graphic designer apply for a post using my artwork in his portfolio. I was more than a bit shocked that someone would dare to do such a thing, but I went along with it to see how far he’d go with the lie.
I asked him all about the work and the thinking behind the designs just to see what he would say, before I showed him the originals and the door.
39. It’s His Time Of The Month
One of my staff is the biggest liar I have ever met. We’ll call him Jim. He lies about everything, regardless of importance. He’s been caught lying multiple times, and really just doesn’t care. If someone is sick, it was guaranteed that he would be off the next day having ‘caught’ whatever someone had. My whole department is female (5 of us) except for him. One day, almost all of us were suffering from some horrible period cramps. Everyone was complaining about the pain, but no one said it was because of their period, because it’s usually pretty obvious why.
The next day, he sent an email that he’s sick and had caught the horrible stomach bug all the ladies in the department had. He explained that he was so sore that he couldn’t move, had a migraine, blah blah blah. Word spread quickly, and Jim has forever been mocked as the dude who had to take time off work for his period. He won’t be let go, but he does get his pay docked when he flakes off like this. It was worth it to be able to make fun of him forever.
38. Claiming What’s Not Theirs
One time, my family’s company was throwing a Christmas party at an upscale restaurant in NYC. We were in a private room upstairs, but it wasn’t like there was security or anything like that, so anyone could and eventually did come upstairs to mooch. Anyway, I’m there with several members of my family having a good time, enjoying some food and drinks, and getting to know people in the company. I’m sitting at a table with several employees I had just met, and two of my cousins who worked with them, when two guys come up to our table and introduce themselves. They were professionally dressed and were quite friendly. They start asking people what they do, flirting with several of the girls at the table, and trying to act pretty alpha (they asked me what I did, which was graphic design at the time, and kinda laughed at my career choice).
So being a few drinks in, I ask what they do at the company, and they say that their family owns the business. I take a long look at the two of them, take a sip off my drink, and say. “Oh, really? I must have missed you at the last family reunion. By the way, I’m Theodore [Company’s Name], nice to meet you.” The look on their faces was priceless. They put down their drinks and just walked out.
37. It’s Their “Doppelgangers”
I had a guy at my old job leave an hour early “because his pregnant girlfriend needed to go to the hospital.” Of course, he’s allowed to go because who’s going to stop someone from taking a pregnant lady to the hospital? Well, my shift ended at the same time that he left and I met up with my family and went to the firework show at the fair located less than a mile from my job.
About 10 minutes into the show, my brother goes, “Isn’t that your coworker and his pregnant girlfriend?” And sure enough, the idiot left early to take his girl to see fireworks. I called him out the next day; he denied it. He still denies it to this day. I guess him and his GF must have a set of doppelgangers who happen to drive the same busted car as them.
36. Breaking Up with Her Fake Boyfriend
My best friend in high school kept getting asked by different people how long he had been dating “Jane.” He didn’t know what they were talking about and then found out “Jane” was the dorky girl with glasses and eczema who kept a picture of him on her nightstand and told everyone he was her boyfriend. She even told her family they were dating and would make up stories about how they went to the car show one weekend and how romantic he was when they went to dinner, etc. Anytime they wanted to meet him, she would make up excuses for why he couldn’t come (sick, work, etc).
He finally confronted her in the hallway one day and told her he had no clue who she was and to stop telling people he was her boyfriend. She said, “It’s over. I told you I didn’t want to see you again! Now leave me alone!” and walked away. The look on his face was priceless- a total “WTH just happened?” moment. She ended up telling people that he was too clingy and had to break up with him. Her geeky friends all gave him dirty looks in the halls after that. She truly believed they had dated and that she broke up with him.
35. Try Again, Dude!
I was the manager of a convenience store. One day, a customer came in and said that he had talked to the manager the day before and had paid ahead of time for some products. I said, “Oh, Jake?” The customer replied, “Yeah, him.” So I said, “Oh, one minute, he is in the back; let me go get him.” So I went into the back and put my name tag on that said manager in it.
Then, I walked back up front and introduced myself to the customer as the manager and how I could help him. He turned really red and walked out, never to be seen again. All my regulars in line laughed and told me that was the funniest thing they had ever witnessed.
34. The Sparkling Bruises
A girl I go to school with did everything she could for attention. She walked into class one day with a huge bruise on her cheek, claiming that she had been hit at a party. Fast-forward a few days and we’re both at a mutual friend’s house, she still has the “bruise,” and won’t stop talking about it and she even tried to make us feel bad for her. Upon looking a little closer, I see that the “bruise” is slightly sparkly. It’s obviously makeup.
So I tell her that I have something to put on bruises to make them heal faster, and she agrees to try it out. It was actually makeup remover. I put some on a cotton pad and with one swipe, the bruise was gone. At first, she tried to keep the lie going, saying, “Wow! That stuff really works!” and such, but then she gave up and stormed out of the house throwing a fit.
33. The Acting Wasn’t Cutting It
We used to know this girl who compulsively lied about the littlest things, so we always wondered if she was lying about other things. Mainly we wondered if she was lying about having epilepsy.
Well, she faked a fit in front of a group of us once, at a party. She started pretending to shake, fell to the floor and so on. She then stopped, confirmed that people were looking and paying attention, and then continued. We told her to stop and that she was obviously faking. She left.
32. Fired on the Spot
My boyfriend used to work third shift at a popular gas station on the East Coast. He worked with one of those notoriously terrible coworkers that would call in all the time with tons of excuses. Well, one night, she called in claiming to be sick, that she was vomiting and feverish, and couldn’t come in. The only person available to work her shift was the district manager, who happened to be in the area for a meeting.
The district manager comes in and works the cash register with my boyfriend. Around 3 am, who should walk in but the called-out coworker wasted beyond belief. She bought two rolls of Tums and ate one while waiting in line for the district manager to ring her up and fire her on the spot.
31. Don’t Mess With Grandpa
I went to a Chicago Bears game back in the early 1990s with my childhood best friend and his grandfather, a longtime season ticket holder. We get to the seats, which are in an awesome location, to see four guys sitting in grandpa’s seats. My friend’s grandpa tells them, “Guys, you are in our seats, can you please move?” One of the guys is a huge jerk and says the seats belong to him and his friends. The grandpa says they are wrong and they need to move, to which one guy replies, “Oh yeah, well I don’t see your name on them so bugger off!”
The grandpa points to the seatback on the seat nearest to him, which in fact has an engraved nameplate with Grandpa’s name on it, same with all the other seats. Since he had the same seats for so long, he was able to get them engraved. It was amazing watching these four idiots stammer and walk away.
30. Busted Via Sticker
I once worked with a girl who would always talk about how expensive her clothes were. And she’d brag when no one asked her anything to begin with.
We worked for the police department so while changing into her uniform she took off her shoes and I saw a Payless shoe sticker.
29. But I Was There…
I worked at a convenience store and a girl got fired for stealing cash from the register, as well as lotto tickets. A few months later, she came in and started talking to me at the register, saying she had been unjustly fired. I reminded her that she had been stealing. She said they just made that up to get her fired.
I then also reminded her that she had been caught on camera and had admitted to doing it when our boss confronted her about it with me standing five feet away at that time. She just took her stuff and left.
28. Cheaters Never Win
I knew my ex-wife was cheating but didn’t tell her that I knew. I took her out to dinner and I casually asked questions about who she had been spending time with while I was at sea- she barely worked so she had to spend her time doing something. She failed to mention the guy that had been staying at my house for nearly two months, the guy she had to call the cops on just to get him to leave because I was coming home in two days.
So, I slid her a copy of the police report that was filed for the incident and watched as she crumbled over the fact she had been caught, and I didn’t have to say a word. The divorce court was even more satisfying, in case anyone was wondering.
27. Her Bestfriend Spilled the Beans!
My ex told me she was sick and couldn’t go out with me that night. For some reason, her best friend was mad at her that night and called me to tell me my girlfriend was cheating on me with a guy named Mike. She even told me what street he lived on. So I drive down this street looking for her car, but don’t see it. As I’m driving away, I notice there’s an alley behind the houses. Sure enough, there’s her car. I go back to the front door and knock. Some guy answers and I say, “Is Mike here?” The voice said, “Yeah, he’s up in his room,” pointing up the stairs by the door, then stands aside to let me in.
I walk up the stairs, open the door, and there’s my girlfriend putting her shirt back on. All she says is “What the heck!”, while Mike is still in bed under the blankets. She goes into hysteria mode, asking me how I found her, how I got in, while this guy keeps saying, “Dude, I did not know she had a boyfriend! Why didn’t you tell me?” over and over. The situation was so messed up that I just had to giggle, but quickly returned to reality and walked out before I hurt someone. The roommate that let me in, even after hearing all the commotion, was sitting there playing Playstation. I nodded and said, “thanks,” as I walked out the door.
26. A Radiator for a Non-Radiator Car
A lube tech at a Jiffy Lube tried to convince me that I needed a radiator service on a car that didn’t have a radiator. He even showed me a pH strip to “prove” that the fluid had gone acidic.
I told him if he could show me the radiator, I’d cheerfully pay for the service. His face when he opened my car’s trunk (where most cars keep their hoods) was pretty priceless.
25. You Broke It, You Pay For It
I work for a broadcast camera house. We rent out camera systems to shows, news, sports, etc. A few years back, a client rented a few cameras and some specialty lenses, including one very rare, very expensive fisheye. It’s not made anymore, so replacing it is possible, and fixing it will be extremely expensive. The package came back at the end of the job and the lens had a divot the size of a quarter taken out of the front element. I mean, this thing was trashed. I called the producer to have the ‘You broke it, we’re billing you to fix it’ conversation and within seconds, the conversation broke down to the ‘This is crap, we never even used it, it never came off the camera truck, I can’t believe we’re being treated this way’ screamfest.
Meanwhile, it turns out that the client had also rented a few tape decks. One of them still had a tape in it. On a whim, we watched the tape, and darn if it wasn’t footage from the camera with the lens in question very clearly showing the truck driving into it and it was a big hit, too. The truck had to be going at least 25 mph. I grabbed the tape and went to the producer’s office. I let him scream a bit (in front of about ten other people – he’s the type that likes an audience) before showing them the tape. I made sure to shuttle back and forth a bit, slow it down, replay it a few times. I also showed them the part where his name was visible on the slate. The look on his face was priceless. It ended up being a $20,000 repair bill. I never heard from him again. It was worth it.
24. She’s Just ‘Protecting’ It
I was around 15 years old and had a package delivered to my house. My crazy neighbor came over, paced back and forth in front of the door before smoothly opening our gate, coming to the door, and picking up my package. I opened the door as she was walking off and she turned white as a ghost when she heard the door open.
When I asked her what the hell she was doing with my package, she explained to me that she was going to protect it for me, that she didn’t know it was mine before I demanded she hand over my package and leave. I snapped at this lady, which was abnormal for shy little 15-year-old me. I was furious because what was inside that package was a gift for my mother, who was at work at the time. I’ll never forget that.
23. Cancer Treatment Or Something Else?
Back when I was in grad school, a girl in my group was ostensibly fighting cancer. The adviser was super understanding, she got all the time off she needed, got funding, so she didn’t need to teach classes to support herself. She flew back home to New York frequently for treatment too. We all just assumed that she had a rich family (she did) and they had some specialist there that they wanted her to see. Until she posted a bunch of pictures of herself at the beach in Florida while she was supposed to be getting cancer treatment. It was evident from the pictures that she was in great shape- not at all what you’d expect from someone undergoing chemo and radiation.
It turned out that she had faked the whole thing, and on top of all of it, was using the trips to cheat on her fiance who was in the military. The worst part about all of it was that the adviser didn’t kick her out and she ended up graduating, but she basically got shunned for the rest of her time there.
22. Nice Try, Boss
I travel for work. 90% of the time I park in the economy at the airport (around $14 per day) which is about a 10 to 15-minute walk from the terminal. A few times, out of necessity to catch a flight, I park in the garage (around $24 per day) which is a 5-minute walk. The trips are usually 2 to 3 days, so it’s not a huge expense. My boss suggests I park in off-site shuttle parking (about $11 a day, but it’s a huge pain as you need a bunch more time to plan for the shuttle). He said he does it because it’s cheaper for the company (which he owns).
One day, while walking through the garage from the economy, there in the reserved parking (closest and like $40 per day) is my boss’ truck. Reserved takes planning, so he wasn’t just running late and needed to park in the garage to make a flight. I simply put my business card under his wiper. I never brought it up, and I haven’t heard any complaints about parking on my expense reports since then.
My partner is a paramedic (I’m only NREMT-B, unfortunately) but we had a kid obviously faking a seizure. My partner said, “Oh crap, I think we’ll have to drop a king airway.” The mom naturally asks, “What’s a king airway?”
My partner very calmly and serious says, “We have to stick a needle through his Adam’s Apple and attach it to the oxygen.” I don’t think I’ve ever seen a kid stop a seizure and come out of his shakes so quickly and start crying, “Mommy!!!”
20. Caught and STILL Denying It
I caught my ex-husband cheating and he said, “No, I’m not having an affair!” So I asked, “Well, then why do I have two hundred pages worth of IMs, texts and emails with private content sent between you and her?” He said, “I, uh, I was hacked!”
I then said, “For four and a half years?” and he answered, “Y…yes?” Really huh? So I asked, “How did the hackers get these 37 nude pictures of you?” And I kid you not, his answer was, “That’s not me.” I definitely knew that it was him, birthmark, pasty fatness and all.
19. Fake Cancer Ends Up with a Huge Medical Bill
I once knew a girl who claimed to have brain cancer. She was always using it to get sympathy from people and free things, while at the same time drinking and taking unprescribed meds. She would go to a party, drink all night, and the next day complain on Facebook that her chemo was making her really sick that day. Basically, whenever she wanted a free bar tab, or to get out of something her boyfriend wanted to do, brain cancer was her excuse. So one night I was at a Halloween party and she was there. She was sitting in the corner smoking, crying about how hard it was to have this kind of cancer, and how much the “blast radiation” made her sick, and how each day was “a struggle.”
Anyway, she got up to walk to the bathroom, and in her state, tripped and fell. Immediately, a bunch of guys and her boyfriend rushed to her aid. “Sorry, a side effect of the radiation is loss of balance.” I point to her boyfriend, “Call 911, we need an ambulance here now, explain to them that she is undergoing blast radiation for brain cancer, she has taken a hard fall and could have suffered a head injury.” At this point, she started to panic, “Why are you calling 911? Don’t do that! Here let me call my personal doctor instead!” I calmly tell her boyfriend and the group of bystanders (our mutual friends) that she really should go to the E.R. Of course, he insisted. Long story short, when the nurse finally came out to the waiting room after her MRI to let us know that she was fine, her boyfriend mentioned the brain cancer. The nurse, of course, was completely confused by this question. The boyfriend prods for more info from the nurse and basically finds out in front of the ENTIRE group that she did not have brain cancer. Everyone was shocked and left, including her bf.
18. He’s Really a “Fan”
I met this guy who wanted to join my band, and he was a huge Pearl Jam and Rolling Stones fan. So I had asked him If he was a fan of the band “stone sessions,” Ma band I made up on the spot.
He then told me he had every one of their albums. The look on his face was priceless when I told him I made up the band.
17. You Told Me So…
I had a boss who kept getting angry at me because I ‘wasn’t doing what he told me to do.’ After a while, I finally decided to start writing down exactly what he told me, dating it, and keeping a record of it.
A day came where he inevitably asked, “What the heck are you doing?!” I told him, “Exactly what you told me to do.” He said, “I never told you to do that!” I then said, “Well, I have it written here…” I pull out my note card: “On 5/22/16, you told me specifically to do this task, exactly like this, and never any other way.” I finally won. I started standing up for myself a bit more in the office, and I was respected for it.
16. Check The Last Name
I come from a small-ish town. My brother made it to the MLB and I was at the grocery store with my dad (who was wearing the MLB team’s jacket at the time). The checker said to us, “You know I helped that kid get to the majors?” (referring to my brother).
My dad just politely pulled out his ID and told him to check the last name. The checker just laughed embarrassingly, immediately shut up, and gave us extra monopoly tickets for our time.
15. Keep Dreaming, Gurlll!
Years ago, back in school, I had a friend that often made up outrageous lies to get attention, but being her good friend, I often believed her or at least didn’t call her out on them as she was having a lot of home life problems and was a pretty lonely girl.
She said she had a secret boyfriend and would bring in a picture to show us; what she brought in was a badly cut out picture of Aaron Carter from a magazine, which was glued to a card so we couldn’t see the snippet of dating advice on the other side.
14. I See What You Did There
I worked in an IT department and had the option of taking some leave time as cash. This required submitting a form to my then-manager, who had it in for me at that time. After several hours, I decided to take a stroll over to Accounting and talk to a fellow co-worker to see if she had received the paperwork. She hadn’t. I then asked if there would be any foreseeable problem with issuing me the cash. “Nope,” she said. “Just need the paperwork.”
I went back to my desk and not five minutes later, my manager walked by the door on her way home for the day (at 1:30 no less) and told me that she had talked to Accounting and said they couldn’t issue me the check. “Who did you talk to?” I asked. “(Name)” she said. “That’s funny,” I replied, “because I just spoke to her 5 minutes ago and she said it wouldn’t be a problem. Let’s go talk to her.” “No, no….I’ll go talk to her,” my manager replied. And wouldn’t you know it, I got my check 15 minutes later!
13. “Oh! Me too!”
I have a gluten allergy (I cannot eat anything containing wheat, barley, or rye). I went out with a friend once and some of her friends. One of them, upon finding out about my allergy, said, “Oh! Me too!” and I honestly didn’t think anything of it at first; we had a short conversation about it and that was it.
Fast forward a few hours to dinner and the woman ordered pasta carbonara and not the gluten-free version. I watched her consume all of it and the bread it came with. I laughed with my friend about it later. Apparently, the woman, though sweet, a compulsive liar.
12. At Least He Learned His Lessons
I have a friend who was a compulsive liar. When we first met in college, he told us (me and my other friends) he was worth a bunch of money because his grandfather was a huge political leader in Zambia (easily verifiable) and that his mom was the editor-in-chief at a top fashion magazine. He told us he had a sister, then, a year later, said she died of an overdose.
I confronted him about everything a few months later and he came clean about all of it, even things I didn’t know about. He comes from a middle-class family, and he never even had a sister. He had a lot of troubles in his childhood, and I guess this is how it has manifested in his young adult years. He went and got professional help, and he’s doing much better now. He’s now one of the best friends I’ve ever had. It’s also pretty satisfying seeing him living as he is now, rather than behind all those obvious lies.
11. But Wait…
A friend of mine works in a highly specialized field of IT, and someone copied his resume for a job that he was interviewing for.
The exact resume, no changes at all, except the name and contact info. It had the same projects, at the same time, the same companies, everything. Even the same formatting and font. The worst part was, when my friend busted him on it, the guy, who was Indian, accused my friend of being racist.
10. Customer is Always Right… But They’re NOT
I work at a retail place in a mall and we sometimes got people who tried to return stuff that they swore up & down they got from our store.
My favorite thing was showing them the tag on the item that not only wasn’t from our store, but not from anywhere in our mall.
9. Forging All His Papers
I had a co-worker once who talked about all his previous jobs. Fire lieutenant, NCIS Investigator, active duty Navy, etc. I knew something wasn’t right because the dude was 24 years old!
We worked for an ambulance service. He applied to a volunteer rescue squad and they discovered that he had forged all of his EMS certifications! He got called into the office and was terminated.
8. It “Looks Like” Mine
One of the oddest bonding moments I’ve had with my best friend occurred over my lost Gameboy Pocket. I’d lost it a few weeks before but wasn’t overly upset (I wasn’t super into it, I only had the Frogger game for it). I came over to his house one day, and he told me he found a Gameboy in the field by his house. He showed it to me, and it looked just like mine (transparent green). At that time, though, it didn’t click in my head that, of course, this was my lost Gameboy. I didn’t know anyone else who had one, so I guess I assumed they were all that color, and probably most people had Frogger for it as well.
We sat down and started taking turns playing, and after a moment, he remarked that it was weird that it was the same game that I had. We looked at each other for a moment, and we could each see the wheels turning in the other’s eyes. Suddenly it clicked and he handed me my lost Gameboy.
7. A Lie Turned Into Reality
My cousin, brothers and I all went to the same Job Corps and were allowed to go home for the weekend after class on Fridays. My cousin decides that he wanted to leave early on Friday, so he got my brother’s girlfriend to pretend to be his mother and had her call the school. She said that his (my cousin’s) grandmother died and he must come home to be with his family. Of course, the school let him leave as soon as they told him. Later on in the day, I happened to see my mother and aunt at the school. This was very strange, as they never visited the school.
It turns out, his grandmother REALLY HAD DIED! His mother called the school and they were, of course, confused because they thought she had already called. So that led them to come to the school and try to figure this mess out (and figure out where my cousin had gone). If I remember correctly, he got a very light punishment for it.; something like, he wasn’t allowed to go home for a few weekends or something.
6. Pink Eye Patch
I work at a daycare and if a child is sick, they will be sent home because we don’t want to risk infecting the whole class (generally happens anyway). A lot of parents don’t agree with this policy, which leads to them arguing with us that their kid isn’t sick when they obviously are. My favorite time this happened was when a mother dropped her little boy off in an eye patch. Yep, the toddler was wearing an actual eye patch. I ask what happened, and she said he hit his eye or something, which I didn’t really believe.
She said whatever I do, don’t take off his eye patch. I pick him up and immediately lift up his eye patch; it was pink eye. She was so mad at me for doing that and was completely shocked I did it. Although I got yelled at by my supervisor for doing it, the look on the mother’s face was so satisfying.
5. Tampons Don’t Lie
My buddy was dating my roommate. They broke up, which made it awkward for me. Well, she went crazy on him and told him she was pregnant and the baby was his.
After he told me this (we lived in a two bedroom, one bath), I started noticing that the stash of tampons my roommate kept under the sink were dwindling. Upon hearing this news from me, I’ve never seen a more relieved person.
4. I Stared, He Cried
When I was 7 or 8, I was all about collecting Pokemon cards. I had a binder set up with the card protectors, Pokemon stickers, my own personal Pokemon drawings…the whole shebang. My most prized card was my holographic Moltres. One day, I noticed there was a scratch on the card and threw a fit like only an 8-year-old scorned knows how. I immediately asked my younger brother if he had been taking my cards out, which he vehemently denied. I started to think that maybe I had accidentally scratched the card, which brought about a mini-existential crisis. I kid you not, I lost sleep thinking I couldn’t look after my Pokemon cards.
Anyway, the next day, I’m at the bus stop with my brother and my neighbor when my neighbor starts talking about how cool my brother’s HOLOGRAPHIC MOLTRES is. I just stared at my brother and he started crying. Then I chased him down the street. It felt good.
3. “Borrowing” Stories
I had an employee where I worked who was always “borrowing” other people’s stories and telling them like the situation had happened to him instead.
The ones whose story he used started calling him out on it. They would sit down as he told the story and would say what happened next at the same time he did. He stopped when the third person did it.
2. “Must Have Been My Brother”
When I was young, I had these tiny magnetic figures (not sure what they are called). So, I was at a friend’s house and I had just bought a new pair of them. When I was about to go home, I noticed one was missing.
I got kinda sad and asked him if he had seen it. He said no. But I knew he was a liar, so I searched his pockets. I found it in his back pocket, and he started saying stuff like “I didn’t know it was there, must have been my brother.”
1. The Copy Cat
I am a 3D artist and my company works in collaboration with another company. The owner of the other company is an old guy who doesn’t know much about computers. Anyway, he hired a guy that, according to him, had a pretty nice portfolio. He gave us his name and wanted us to check him out and see what we thought of him.
I track him down on Facebook and when I start going through his gallery, I saw three of my renders which belonged to a set I did for a project. He had a bunch of friends commenting on how good the renders were. I was extremely pissed and decided to do an image search on google for some of the other renders and they all came back from different blogs, tutorials, you name it. He would just take the best renders he saw online and post it as his own on his Facebook gallery. Anyways, he didn’t last long.